# 36 Feast: Bollocks!

Director: John Gulager
Genre: Horror
Key Players: Krista Allen, Henry Rollins (Yes, that Henry Rollins), Jason Mewes, Judah Friedlander

A small band of clashing characters, led by TV actress Krista Allen, are forced to work together in an effort to survive an attack from a bunch of bloodthirsty monsters dressed in fur. I know, it sounds really, really corny and it has got a big "Seen it, done that" stamp all over it. And while that certainly might be true to some degree, Feast will surprise you as a funny and sometimes disgusting horror film filled with great little gags and set pieces. Allen, perhaps best know for her earlier work in which she had a tendency to misplace all of her clothes, carries much of the film on her shoulders and does so with a remarkable flair. And surprisingly, never once does she, or anyone else for that matter, feel the urge to strip down, which is so common, but tiresome, for these types of low-budget horrors. Instead we get to spend time with the large cast and it's many different characters, such as Henry Rollins motivational speaker and Judah Friedlander's beer belly redneck. At times bloody and disgusting, others goofy and not so serious. The latter being my moment of choice. When being chased through the corridors by papa monster, the group slams a door in the monster's face, only to discover that it's brownish weirdly shaped penis got stuck in-between. I smell a barbecue.

#30 Alien: Chestburster

Director: Ridley Scott
Genre: Sci fi/thriller
Key Players: Sigourney Weaver, John Hurt

What would be more appropriate for my thirtieth posting than doing a scene from a film released some thirty years ago. Ridley Scott's slow-burning horror set in space redefined sci-fi for years to come and introduced the almighty Chestburster; a moment for the history books. Feeling a little queezy, John Hurt (fitting name, don't you think) starts panting, at this point unaware that a little monster soon will burst through skin and bone, in a flood of blood and gore, ruining a perfectly good meal. The unexpected horror and total shock of the event is so visceral and authentic, perhaps because no one really knew what was going to happen, and has become one of those extremely iconic moments that, even if you haven't seen the movie in question, you know of it and what it entails. Pure brilliance. Pure Ridley.

# 21 Slither: Pop goes the stomach

Director: James Gunn
Genre: Horror/Comedy
Key Players: Nathan Fillion, Elizabeth Banks, Gregg Henry

In keeping with the exploitation spirit, this is Slither. Troma connected James Gunn, struck gold with his low budget cult splatter-comedy Slither where Joss Whedon favorite Nathan Fillion (Buffy The Vampire Slayer, Firefly, Serenity) lends a great deal of charm and wit to his small town police officer Bill Pardy as they are invaded by slimy malicious worms. And as with most creatures, they all tend to come from a "mother" or host if you will. Well, these slithery worms are no exception. Cue huge bloated woman hidden in the woods (spoiler alert: she later explodes!). Funny and gruesome. A great deal of fun.

#10 30 Days Of Night: Utilidor bloodshed

Director: David Slade
Genre: Horror
Key Players: Josh Hartnett

Your friend and partner is turning into an angry vampire right before you - what do you do? Chop his fucking head off with a giant axe, of course. What else is there?

AAAARGH - SPLAFF - FLASHP

#1 Braindead - Lawn mower massacre

Director: Peter Jackson
Genre: Horror/Comedy

Key Players: Timothy Balme, a shitload of zombies

Seventeen years after the fact, Braindead is still considered as one of the most influential pieces within the horror/comedy genre. With many funny moments to chose from, people best seem to remember the outrageous house party at the end and it's classic blood soaked ending. Armed with only a lawn mower, our hero Lionel, mows his way through a crowd of zombies, literally wading through a pool of blood and slippery guts. Now, that's funny.